Doyle: Do tigers know whether we have bones?
Daddy: I don't know.
Doyle: Do they?
Daddy: Um, yes probably they know that we have bones.
Doyle: How do they know?
Daddy: Um, I guess their mummies and daddies told them.
Doyle: But they can only say “roar”.
Daddy: Um, then I guess they probably don't know whether we have bones.

Doyle: Why is that light off?
Daddy: Because it's broken.
Doyle: How can we fix it?
Daddy: It's not our job to fix it, it's the hotel's job to fix it.
Doyle: How can the hotel fix it by itself?
Daddy: I mean, it's the job of the people at the hotel to fix it.

Mummy: Who's coming for your birthday?
Doyle: Granny and Grandpa. But their real names are Toucan and Peach.

Doyle got a head start with dinner tonight, grabbing the crackers on the table. In explaining his actions, he said, “I ate it already. It's what kids do.”

Leo has been feeling unwell, and spent last night awake. Doyle made a clever observation about this the next morning.
Daddy: Mummy and Leo were awake last night, did you hear them?
Doyle: They are asleep in the morning.
Daddy: Yes, they are asleep this morning because they were awake last night.
Doyle: Maybe Leo and Mummy are bats.

THE BOY WHO LOVED PINK MILK
the boy's name who loved pink milk was doyle
THE END bye bye

The Man WHO LOST his HAND
I oh yep carp okay no no no! kop my voice oh it's okay (love) lopolop pink milk
the man got a fish but the fish ate the man's hand THE END

Mummy made some pink and white heart chocolates, and Doyle took them out of the fridge, eating nine without his parents noticing. Mummy was angry.
Mummy (after much discussion): Mummy was trying to do something nice for everyone. Don't you want Mummy to make chocolates again?
Doyle: No, because if you make more chocolates, then I might eat them all.

Not being content with the standard three items in “rock, paper, scissors,” or, in the way Doyle was taught at school, “scissors, paper, stone,” which meant that Doyle's favourite choice of paper could always be defeated by his opponent once they caught on, if they kept choosing scissors, Doyle added “rain,” which could defeat everything. Well, Mummy didn't like that idea, and added “roof,” because something needed to be able to defeat rain. Before long, Doyle had also added nail, duct tape, sticky tape, drawing pad and pencil to the mix, for the most confusing edition of “rock, paper scissors,” titled, “scissors, paper, stone, rain, roof, nail, duct tape, sticky tape, drawing pad, pencil.” We're still unsure of a lot of combinations of what beats something else.

After reading Doyle his bedtime stories, Mummy spelled something not quite nice.
Mummy: Did you fart?
Doyle: Yes, but it was a good fart.

Doyle has really taken a keen interest in conversing with people on the Internet. Now on his own, he tries to figure out how to spell the words he wants to say on his own. Below is a transcript with his favourite chat buddy, our friend Reileen from the Philippines. Translations of his words are provided in italics, in case you need them when his spelling isn't correct.

Doyle: BYE BYE DOT GO Bye bye don't go
Reileen: oh hello doyle
Reileen: bye bye
Doyle: HALLO AGEN REILEEN Hello again Reileen
Doyle: BYE
Doyle: WAR IS REILEEN NAW Where is Reileen now?
Doyle: I DOT KNOW I don't know
Reileen: haha
Reileen: what did you have for breakfast?
Doyle: ME OH NOP NOT ME I'M NOY MUMMY'S FWND WOT DED YOU SAE Me oh nope not me I'm now Mummy's friend. What did you say?
Reileen: I was asking you on what you ate for breakfast
Doyle: NOP I SED WOT DID YOU SAI Nope I said what did you say?
Doyle: CAN YOU DO DA SAM AS ME Can you do the same as me
Doyle: 4 YOU MEEN 4 you mean
Doyle: I LAHV DAT I love that
Doyle: I'M DOYLE
Doyle: I LAHV IT I love it
Doyle: I O SO LAEC IT I also like it
Doyle: DOT TAP TOO ME Don't type to me
Doyle: TOO DAE Today
Doyle: I AM GOOD
Doyle: I AM AWRAS GOOD I am always good
Reileen: I know
Reileen: you are always good
Doyle: BHT SAM TAM I AM NOT But sometimes I am not
Doyle: YOU
Doyle: YOUR SILVER I AM SONEC DADDY IS SHADOW You're Silver, I am Sonic, Daddy is Shadow [these are characters from Sonic the Hedgehog that Doyle likes to pretend to be]
Doyle: HALO SILVER Hello Silver
Doyle: I AM SONEC I am Sonic
Doyle: YOUR SILVER You're Silver
Doyle: I'M SONEC I'm Sonic
Reileen: Hi Sonic
Reileen: I am Silver
Reileen: and Daddy is Shadow
Reileen: how about mummy?
Doyle: YES
Doyle: TALRS Tails
Doyle: I MEEN TALS I mean Tails
Reileen: okay then
Reileen: my hands are shaking
Reileen: do you know what might be the reason for it?
Reileen: Silver is a little sick
Doyle: OKAY
Doyle: OKAY
Doyle: OKAY
Doyle: OKAY
Doyle: BAT DAS OKAY But that's okay
Doyle: NOP Nope
Doyle: BYE BYE DOT GO Bye bye don't go
Doyle: I WIW GO TOO MUMMY I will go to Mummy
Reileen: Okay
Doyle: BYE BYE GO
Reileen: bye bye Sonic
Doyle: YES
Doyle: YOU CAN GO NAW You can go now
Doyle: I WIW TAP TOO YOU NEX TAM I will type to you next time
Reileen: okay we will talk next time
Reileen: I will miss you then
Reileen: mwaaaaaaaah
Doyle: GO
Doyle: YOU HWD GO NAW You should go now
Doyle: NAW IS N A W Now is N A W
Reileen: i'm not here anymore
Doyle: YES YOU RRR Yes you are
Doyle: YOUR SILVER I TAWD YOU You're Silver I told you
Doyle: GO
Doyle: BAT YOUR REILEEN AGEN But you're Reileen again
Doyle: DADDY IS STW GWEEN Daddy is still gone [He tried sending IMs to his Daddy at this point]
Reileen: I think Daddy is on the plane
Doyle: NOP Nope
Reileen: then where is he

Doyle: What does 77+77 equal?
Mummy: 154.
Doyle: That's right!

Doyle decided he wanted to chat with his Daddy while he was at work, using an instant messaging program.
Doyle: HELLO DADDY
Daddy: Hello Doyle
Daddy: Did you type HELLO DADDY by yourself?
Doyle: YES
Daddy: Clever boy
Doyle: DID YOU TYPE CLEVER BOY ALLBY YOU SELF ?
Daddy: Yes I did, lol
Daddy: Ask Mummy to add that to your blog
Doyle: MUMMY OK
Daddy: Mummy loves you
Daddy: and Daddy loves you too
Daddy: and Leo loves you
Doyle: AUNTY ELYSE AND GRAMPS LOVES ME
Daddy: Do Granny and Grandpa love you?
Doyle: YES

Doyle: I don't want you to eat salad. Salad is junk food.
Daddy: No, salad is the opposite of junk food.
Doyle: No, cookies are the opposite of junk food.
Daddy: Actually, cookies are the epitome of junk food.
Doyle: Cookies aren't the enemy of junk food, salad is the enemy of junk food.
Mummy: Yes, salad is the enemy of junk food.

While driving in the city…
Daddy: I spy with my little eye something beginning with H.
Doyle: Is it a horse eating hay?
Daddy: No.
Doyle: Is it just a horse?

Doyle: I don't want to go, I want to stay at home.
Daddy: You can only stay home by yourself when you're a teenager.
Doyle: I can stay home when I'm a four-ager.

Doyle: Have you ever seen a talking carrot in a tummy?
Daddy: No, we've never seen anything like that before.
Doyle: Courage has.
Daddy: Has he? Whose tummy did he go inside?
Doyle: His mummy's!
(A short time later)
Doyle: Have you ever seen a talking banana?
Mummy: No.
Doyle: It was in Garfield's world!

Doyle: I don't want to go to school.
Daddy: But all good boys and girls go to school.
Doyle: But I'm a naughty boy.

Daddy: Where did you put the scissors, Doyle?
Mummy: I put them away because Doyle was playing with them
Doyle: I wasn't playing with them… I was just scissing them.

Doyle: There are no animals in Malaysia.
Daddy: Yes there are, remember the monkeys that we sometimes see at the park?
Doyle: No.
Daddy: We need to take you out to see some more animals.
Doyle: No, I don't want to go out and look for animals, I just want to watch animals here [on TV].

We thought that Doyle had been a good boy and eaten all his raisins, since they were gone from his bowl. Some time later we found them neatly arranged at regular intervals along each of our CD and DVD shelves in the living room.

Doyle: I want to go swimming. If you don't want to go with me then I will go by myself. But I can't go by myself because I'm not tall enough.
Daddy: Okay, get your swimmers.
Doyle: Okay, but where do I get them from? You have to get your swimmers first and then you have to get my swimmers.

Doyle (to Mummy): Do you want to be alone? I never want to be alone.
Daddy: When you move out, are you going to get a girlfriend? Or are you going to get married?
Doyle: Mummy and Daddy are going to get married.
Mummy: Mummy and Daddy are already married.
Doyle: (squeals) Are you a princess?
Mummy (laughing): Princesses aren't the only people who can get married.

Doyle (rejecting his last chicken nugget): I don't like this.
Daddy: Why not?
Doyle: I don't like eating, I only like watching TV shows with fighting.
Daddy: Daddy doesn't like shows with fighting. He doesn't think it's nice.
Doyle: We have to stop watching shows that haven't got fighting.

Doyle: What the heck is in here?
Mummy: Doyle, don't say “heck”. It's not appropriate language.
Doyle: Can I say “What the ham?”
Mummy: Yes, you can say “What the ham.”
Doyle: What the ham is in here? … What the ham am I doing? …

We were shopping for shoes for Doyle. As he was trying them on, the sales clerk asked him, “What country are you from?” She seemed a bit bemused when he insisted, “Malaysia”.

Doyle: I want Mummy to give me some more sausage.
Daddy: Mummy can't, she's in the bedroom feeding Leo. But Daddy can give you some more sausage.
Doyle: No, I want Mummy to give it to me.
(Daddy disappears for a while.)
Mummy: OK, I made some more sausage appear on your plate by magic.
(Doyle goes into the living room to check.)
Doyle: You did!

We have a guest, Reileen, staying with us. At storytime, I asked Doyle, “Do you want Daddy or Reileen to read you your story tonight?”
Doyle replied, “Does Reileen know how to read?”
Reileen is 25 years old.

Now that Doyle is attending pre-school, he has been picking up Malaysianisms. Earlier this evening he was appending “ah” to all his questions, and just now at story-time he repeated a line Malaysian style: “…moved onto boats, lah!” Bless.

One of Doyle's favourite games at the moment is Beatle's Rock Band. Here's a clip of him singing “A Hard Day's Night.”

Doyle often pretends to be carrying long conversations with his family and friends on the phone. This morning, this was overheard during the conversation…

“When is your birthday? … Oh, I see. Will you have a ladybird cake? … Will you have a cake with flowers on it, or a cake with flowers not on it? … When will your birthday party be? … Oh OK, never. When will your birthday party never be?”

“Daddy, what does kiffke mean?”, Doyle asked me was we were sitting down to dinner at a restaurant tonight. I had no idea. Then I looked around and realised what restaurant we were eating in. It was KFC.

Doyle: Your name is Dominica. I don't call you Mummy any more.

Doyle: Daddy's a male.
Mummy: Yes.
Doyle: And you're an e-male.
Mummy: Do you mean female?
Doyle: No, ladies are e-mails, not females!

Daddy (leaving): See you later, alligator!
Doyle: There is no people called Alligator.
Daddy: Oh, I'm sorry. I was obviously mistaken.

Daddy: We need to wash your feet, they're very dirty.
Mummy: They're filthy.
Doyle: They're not filthy. They're just colourful.

[While being shown a solar system simulation including the Earth and Sun]: Does the Sun have countries?